What I Hear When You Say, “I can’t…”

This Limiting Belief is One of the Most Powerful

(Part 1/3 of What “I can’t…” Means)

In NLP*, we dive into – and re-wire! – your mind using language. Which means that when I’m working with you I pay very close attention to every word that comes out of your mouth.

A while ago, we were talking about Comfort Zones and nozzle points and I mentioned that one of the signs you were in a nozzle point was saying, “I can’t…”

Every now and then, even my best clients tell me those fateful words:

“I can’t…”

what it really means when you say "I can't"

At first, I was going to write to you about how much I hate those words and how they trigger me and how disempowering they are … and then I realized that that wasn’t really the truth.

(at least, not anymore)

The truth is that when I hear a client say, “I can’t…” I get excited.

Really excited.

Most people would think it was unreasonably excited.

I mean, really, they’re just two little words, Vanessa.

Well, that’s why I’m a Coach and they’re not. 😉

Why do I get so excited?

Because when I hear you say, “I can’t…” I know that I’m hearing a limiting belief.

(it’s okay, it’s an NLP thing)

I’m hearing a rule that you’ve made up for yourself that is holding you back.

In short, I’m hearing a lie.

"I can't" is a lie

And it’s a lie that has probably been whispered to you for as long as you can remember.

For so long, that you don’t even recognize it anymore.

For so long, that your Unconscious Mind believes that it is true.

You hear it and you think it’s a truth.

But it’s a lie.

demon whispering into ear "I can't..."

And for those of you contrarians – yes, I know you’re my people! – who are *right now* thinking, “That’s not true! There are lots of things I can’t do like drink liquid magma, or fly to the sun, or play in the NBA!”… just stop.

You know very well I’m not talking about those things nor am I interested in a grammar conversation where we examine all the places where ‘I can’t’ is legit.

Pay attention you, this is important!

*shakes head*

I’m talking about all the rules you’ve created for yourself that keep you small, that keep you stuck, and that keep you so firmly rooted inside your Comfort Zone that your soul starts to shrivel and the fire that once burned so deep and bright in your belly begins to dim and die away.

what rules are causing your soul to shrivel?

In Part 2, we’ll look at some of the ways that ‘I can’t’ shows up and how it impacts your business and family.

Questions? Thoughts? Drop me a line and let me know.

*Note: NLP is the short-form of neuro-linguistic programming, a toolbox of therapeutic modalities that we use to re-wire your neurology with language so that you can have what you desire and have it faster than you ever dreamed possible.

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"I can't" is a powerful limiting belief that keeps us deep in self-sabotage.